NEW BLOGGER: Nad-e Ali Blog 2: Showering with Race Horses
One thing you can say about stabilisation work: it’s not quick. By contrast, working with 3 Para is like trying to coral alpha male race horses. The brain power, planning, muscle and determination is seriously impressive. I’ve worked in a lot of countries and seen a lot of military – Britain is very fortunate to have guys (and women) like these in its armed forces.
Anyway, speed: while 3 Para take on and clear the insurgency from the northern part of Nad-e Ali, this STABAD, and my colleagues in the Military Stabilisation Support Team, slide in behind and work on helping the Afghan government set up schools and clinics. No doubt at all that clearing insurgents is the dangerous bit. And, with the silky skills of 3 Para, it’s also the quick bit. Helping the Afghan government build community services carries none of the risks – but, boy, is it slow in comparison to whizzing around in Mastiff and Jackal armoured vehicles.
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For us to assist Afghanistan to build, say, a school, we have to make sure it is in the provincial development plan, get the backing of the (excellent) Deputy Governor, the support of the local members of the 42-man District Community Council, the district representative of the ministry responsible, make sure the land is government owned, find a teacher willing to teach in what, until a few days earlier, was “contested space” (love those military terms), find a contractor also willing to work in a recent war zone… get the cash (surprisingly the easy bit with donor funds available)… and, err, that’s it. This takes time slightly longer than 3 Para’s clearing operation. If the military bit is akin to corralling race horses, the next bit is more like herding cats. Time to “clear” the insurgents: 48 hours. Time to build a school: errr, 12 months? And for the rest there is MasterCard, eh? |
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So, to help deliver something to the community in the meantime and to avoid all sorts of people - mainly senior British commanders - getting frustrated at the “slow” (to them, not to Afghans) progress, we work on temporary fixes. This can add up to “a School In A Box”. Essentially a tent, portable desks, chairs and a blackboard – in a box. Well, yes, it’s a big box. Oh ok, it’s very big box. Lots of boxes. This can be set up in a compound lend by someone from the community. And, bingo, off and running….. well, walking maybe. A school of sorts and very welcome to the village communities. And way better than the alternative.
Getting such a scheme started recently in one community involved me in a number of helicopter rides to the District Centre to meet various Afghan officials. This is the ultimate home-office commute, zooming at low level over the countryside, a bit like a roller coaster ride. Helicopter goes one way; stomach the other. Always good to have beans for brekkie first.
The “Forward Operating Base” close to the District Centre feels a bit like a resort after my home, “Patrol Base” Shazad. Indoor flushing loos, hot indoor showers and a laundry. A laundry! I kid you not. Luxury. And, yes, I partook.
If I may share the Shazad showering experience with you (well not literally of course): beautiful crystal-clear blue skies outside. And pretty much freezing. In fact the water is frozen in the pipe which provides well-water for washing. Hot water is produced by feeding well-water into a World War 2 piece of kit called a Puffing Billy: essentially an old dustbin with a diesel-fired heating pipe in it.
The showeree scoops water out of Puffing Billy with a plastic bowl, and using a bottled water container which has been cut into a funnel, fills a plastic Solar Shower bag. The water can be scalding hot. The showeree then tries to top-up said Solar Shower with cold water from the, errr, frozen pipe….. The Solar Shower is then hung up in the freezing cold shower tent, the tap is opened and the showeree hops around under a minute trickle of water to soap up and shower off. Luxury. Ha! I may never shower until summer.
So, while you are in your warm bathroom tonight, think of the alpha males of 3 Para: covered in soap, hopping around under a trickle of water that is either scalding or icy. And a STABAD who is trying to keep up. And stop laughing!
Life eh? Bet that warm bathroom shower feels good tonight